Why did you never answer that message? Do you care?
I would like to share with you the story of a student who reached out to me in social media after reading a blog I wrote about injury and recovery. She asked me a question about a particular injury she was facing and how it was not allowing her to practice. Her practice was her only outlet to channel her depression. A condition she has battled since she was a little girl. She was able to free her self of medications using the practice as a healing tool to control her mood swings. But know that she couldn’t practice because of her injury, she felt vulnerable and sad again. As I spend time exchanging messages with her trying to find a way to help her, she told me she had a teacher. I was very surprised to hear that since I thought she was reaching out to me because perhaps she practiced alone. I asked her if she had discussed with her teacher her situation. Her answer was... She tried but she never responded to her message. Because she didn’t know how to modify the postures and the pain was increasing she just stopped practicing. Because of that comment and many more is the reason I am writing this blog today. I want people to know that it is not ok to do that. My son too once faced it the same situation, could be anyone that you love who can be affected by this new way of handling communication or perhaps you yourself have been hurt by the silence of the people who don't care.
Nowadays, communication is so different. We used to talk to people face to face, them we started talking with people on the phone and nowadays it's all based on social media platforms or texting. We have lost in a way the ability of looking at someone eye to see their real emotions and feelings. Is easy now days to hide behind a keyboard and type things that we probably would never say to anyone face to face. Indeed we are facing a culture where everyone is so busy that they are completely self centered on their own life’s and reaching out to others the majority of the time is upon their own needs.
But what happens to other people when you left that phone call, social media message or text message unanswered? Nowadays people can see when their messages are been read ! So the old excuse of being to busy that you haven’t check your messages is not even there any more. Plain blank, nowadays the other person knows that you just choose not to answer. But why you didn’t answer? Perhaps you think you are to busy to bother with it? You don’t know what to write back? Or you just simply don’t care?
Many people fell into depression stages by feeling ignored by others. Hurt by their silence. Is such a big problem now, that our generation feels that it is ok not to answer for days, any messages unless they are work related or school related. And that’s only because it will have a direct impact on them if they don’t answer them. I consider myself being busy most of the day. But I do care about people’s feeling. If anyone texts me or sends me a message in any social media platform or call me. I’ll make sure to respond in a timely matter. Not because I feel I have to. It is because I want to. The power of being listened to, can be a life saver in someone’s life and you don’t know when this is the case. To show that you care and you respect the other person you must take the time to answer the person. If you think it is ok to not read your messages because you are too busy or you don’t have the answer right now, you can literally just say that and answer the message. I am sure that person will understand and know that at least you took the time to care. We don’t have to have the right answer all the time. Make sure that if you have the time to check your social media outlets or have the time to look at your phone then you as well had the time to care for others feelings by answering their messages. I know most people think it's not important. But for the person who just reached out to you, it is important!
We are in sensitive times now where suicidal rates and depression are on the highs. And it is happening at all ages. Affecting children’s and young adults the most.
Please if you do this to others. Stop now. Change the way you communicate with others. We all make mistakes. I have made many but I am whiling to correct them and learn from them. I want to be better and I want to be there in any way I can for others who may need to be heard. I want to be heard to.
Listening to be listened. Love to be loved
And remember you never know how your silence can affect others.